stairs, whilst Fanny repaired with the parson to his house, where she thought herself secure of a kind reception. CHAP. VI. ever, she could not assign any other cause than merely that of being absent from him. Mr Joseph rose early in the morning, and visited her in whom his soul delighted. She no sooner heard his voice in the parson's parlour, than she leapt from her bed, and dressing herself in a few minutes, went down to him. They Of which you are desired to read no more than passed two hours with inexpressible happiness you like. THE meeting between Joseph and Pamela was not without tears of joy on both sides; and their embraces were full of tenderness and affection. They were, however, regarded with much more pleasure by the nephew than by the aunt, to whose flame they were fuel only; and this was increased by the addition of dress, which was indeed not wanted to set off the lively colours in which Nature had drawn health, strength, come liness and youth. In the afternoon, Joseph, at their own request, entertained them with an account of his adventures; nor could Lady Booby conceal her dissatisfaction at those parts in which Fanny was concerned, especially when Mr Booby launched forth into such rapturous praises of her beauty. She said, applying to her niece, that she wondered her nephew, who had pretended to marry for love, should think such a subject proper to amuse his wife with; adding, that for her part, she should be jealous of a husband who spoke so warmly in praise of another woman. Pamela answered, indeed she thought she had cause; but it was an instance of Mr Booby's aptness to see more beauty in women than they were mistresses of. At which words both the women fixed their eyes on two looking-glasses; and Lady Booby replied, that men were, in the general, very ill judges of beauty; and then, whilst both contemplated only their own faces, they paid a cross compliment to each other's charms. When the hour of rest approached, which the lady of the house deferred as long as decently she could, she informed Joseph (whom for the future we shall call Mr Joseph, he having as good a title to that appellation as many others, I mean that incontested one of good clothes), that she had ordered a bed to be provided for him. He declined this favour to his utmost; for his heart had long been with his Fanny; but she insisted on his accepting it, alleging, that the parish had no proper accommodation for such a person as he was now to esteem himself. The squire and his lady both joining with her, Mr Joseph was at last forced to give over his design of visiting Fanny that evening, who, on her side, as impatiently expected him till midnight; when, in complaisance to Mr Adams's family, who had sat up two hours out of respect to her, she retired to bed, but not to sleep; the thought of her love kept her waking, and his not returning according to his promise filled her with uneasiness; of which, how together, and then having appointed Monday, by Mr Adams's permission, for their marriage, Mr Joseph returned, according to his promise, to breakfast at the Lady Booby's, with whose behaviour since the evening we shall now acquaint the reader. She was no sooner retired to her chamber, than she asked Slipslop what she thought of this wonderful creature her nephew had married? "Madam!" said Slipslop, not yet sufficiently understanding what answer she was to make. "I ask you," answered the lady, "what do you think of the dowdy, my niece I think I am to call her?" Slipslop wanting no further hint, began to pull her to pieces, and so miserably defaced her, that it would have been impossible for any one to have known the person. The lady gave her all the assistance she could, and ended with saying, "I think, Slipslop, you have done her justice: but yet, bad as she is, she is an angel compared to this Fanny." Slipslop then fell on Fanny, whom she hacked and hewed in the like barbarous manner, concluding with an observation, that there was always something in those low-life creatures which must eternally distinguish them from their betters. Really, said the lady, "I think there is one exception to your rule; I am certain you may guess who I mean."-" Not I, upon my word, madam,” said Slipslop." I mean a young fellow; sure you are the dullest wretch," said the lady.—“ O la, I am indeed-yes, truly, madam, he is an accession," answered Slipslop.-" Ay, is he not, Slipslop?" returned the lady. "Is he not so genteel, that a prince might without a blush acknowledge him for his son? His behaviour is such that would not shame the best education. He borrows from his station a condescension in every thing to his superiors, yet unattended by that mean servility which is called good behaviour in such persons. Every thing he doth, hath no mark of the base motive of fear, but visibly shews some respect and gratitude, and carries with it the persuasion of love. And then for his virtues; such piety to his parents, such tender affection to his sister, such integrity in his friendship, such bravery, such goodness, that if he had been born a gentleman, his wife would have possessed the most invaluable blessing." "To be sure, ma'am," said Slipslop. "But as he is," answered the lady, " if he had a thousand more good qualities, it must render a woman of fashion contemptible even to be suspected of thinking of him: yes, I should despise myself for such a thought."-"To be sure, ma'am," said Slipslop. And why to be sure?" replied the lady; "thou art always one's echo. Is he not more worthy of affection than a dirty country clown, though born of a family as old as the flood, or an idle worthless rake, or little puisne beau of quality? And yet these we must condemn ourselves to, in order to avoid the censure of the world; to shun the contempt of others, we must ally ourselves to those we despise; we must prefer birth, title, and fortune, to real merit. It is a tyranny of custom, a tyranny we must comply with; for we people of fashion are the slaves of custom." -"Marry come up!" said Slipslop, who now well knew which party to take," if I was a woman of your ladyship's fortune and quality, I would be a slave to nobody!"-" Me," said the lady, "I am speaking, if a young woman of fashion, who had seen nothing of the world, should happen to like such a fellow. Me, indeed! I hope thou dost not imagine"-" No, ma'am, to be sure," cries Slipslop.-" No, what no?" cried the lady. "Thou art always ready to answer before thou hast heard one. So far I must allow, he is a charming fellow. Me, indeed! No, Slipslop, all thoughts of men are over with me. -I have lost a husband, who-but if I should reflect, I should run mad.-My future ease must depend upon forgetfulness. Slipslop, let me hear some of thy nonsense, to turn my thoughts another way. What dost thou think of Mr Andrews?"-"Why, I think," says Slipslop, "he is the handsomest, and most properest man I ever saw; and if I was a lady of the greatest degree, it would be well for some folks. Your ladyship may talk of custom if you please; but I am confidous there is no more comparison between young Mr Andrews, and most of the young gentlemen who come to your ladyship's house in London; a parcel of whipper-snapper sparks: I would sooner marry our old parson Adams: never tell me what people say, whilst I am happy in the arms of him I love. Some folks rail against other folks, because other folks have what some folks would be glad of."-" And so," answered the lady, "if you was a woman of condition, you would really marry Mr Andrews?" -"Yes, I assure your ladyship," replied Slipslop, "if he would have me.' "Fool, ideot," cries the lady, "if he would have a woman of fashion! Is that a question ?"—"No truly, madam," said Slipslop, "I believe it would be none, if Fanny was out of the way; and I am confidous, if I was in your ladyship's place, and liked Mr Joseph Andrews, she should not stay in the parish a moment. I am sure Lawyer Scout would send her a packing, if your ladyship would but say the word." This last speech of Slipslop raised a tempest in the mind of her mis tress. She feared Scout had betrayed her, or rather that she had betrayed herself. After some silence, and a double change of her complexion, first to pale, then to red, she thus spoke: “Í am astonished at the liberty you give your tongue. Would you insinuate that I employed Scout against this wench, on the account of the fellow ?"-"La, ma'am," said Slipslop, frighted out of her wits," I assassinate such a thing!""I think you dare not," answered the lady. "I believe my conduct may defy malice itself to assert so cursed a slander. If I had ever discovered any wantonness, any lightness in my behaviour; if I had followed the example of some whom thou hast, I believe, seen, in allowing myself indecent liberties, even with a husband: but the dear man who is gone," (here she began to sob ;)" was he alive again," (then she produced tears,) "could not upbraid me with any one act of tenderness or passion. No, Slipslop, all the time I cohabited with him, he never obtained even a kiss from me, without my expressing reluctance in the granting it. I am sure he himself never suspected how much I loved him. Since his death, thou knowest, though it is almost six weeks (it wants but a day) ago, I have not admitted one visitor, till this fool my nephew arrived. I have confined myself quite to one party of friends. And can such a conduct as this fear to be arraigned? To be accused not only of a passion which I have always despised, but of fixing it on such an object, a creature so much beneath my notice !"-" Upon my word, ma'am," says Slipslop, "I do not understand your ladyship, nor know I any thing of the matter."-" I believe indeed, thou dost not understand me. These are delicacies which exist only in superior minds; thy coarse ideas cannot comprehend them. Thou art a low creature, of the Andrews breed, a reptile of the lower order, a weed that grows in the common garden of the creation."-"I assure your ladyship," says Slipslop, whose passions were almost of as high an order as her lady's, " I have no more to do with common garden than other folks. Really your ladyship talks of servants as if they were not born of the Christian specious. Servants have flesh and blood, as well as quality; and Mr Andrews himself is a proof that they have as good, if not better. And for my own part, I cant perceive my dears * are coarser than other people's; and I am sure, if Mr Andrews was a dear of mine, I should not be ashamed of him in company with gentlemen; for whoever hath seen him in his new clothes, must confess he looks as much like a gentleman as any body. Coarse, quotha! I can't bear to hear the poor young fellow run down neither: for I will say this, I never heard him say an ill word of any body in * Meaning perhaps ideas. VOL. I. H CHAP. VII. Philosophical reflections, the like not to be found in any light French romance. Mr Booby's grave advice to Joseph, and Fanny's encounter with a beau. his life. I am sure his coarseness doth not lie esteem her a traitress, point at her, and hunt her in his heart; for he is the best-natured man in out of their society. These impressions being the world; and as for his skin, it is no coarser first received, are farther and deeper inculcated than other people's, I am sure. His bosom, when by their school-mistresses and companions; so a boy, was as white as driven snow; and where that by the age of ten, they have contracted such it is not covered with hairs, is so still. Ifakins! a dread and abhorrence of the above-named monif I was Mrs Andrews, with a hundred a year, I ster, that, whenever they see him, they fly from should not envy the best she who wears a head. him as the innocent hare doth from the greyA woman who could not be happy with such a hound. Hence, to the age of fourteen or fifteen, man, ought never to be so: for if he can't make they entertain a mighty antipathy to master; a woman happy, I never yet beheld the man who they resolve, and frequently profess, that they could. I say again, I wish I was a great lady will never have any commerce with him, and enfor his sake; I believe when I had made a gen- tertain fond hopes of passing their lives out tleman of him, he'd behave so, that nobody of his reach, of the possibility of which they should deprecate what I had done; and I fancy have so visible an example in their good maiden few would venture to tell him he was no gen- aunt. But when they arrive at this period, and tleman to his face, nor to mine neither.' At have now passed their second climacteric, when which words, taking up the candles, she asked their wisdom, grown riper, begins to see a little her mistress, who had been some time in her farther, and from almost daily falling in master's bed, if she had any farther commands; who way, to apprehend the great difficulty of keepmildly answered she had none; and telling her ing out of it; and when they observe him look she was a comical creature, bid her good night. often at them, and sometimes very eagerly and earnestly too, (for the monster seldom takes any notice of them till at this age,) they then begin to think of their danger; and as they perceive they cannot easily avoid him, the wiser part bethink themselves of providing by other means for their security. They endeavour, by all the methods they can invent, to render themselves so amiable in his eyes, that he may have no inclination to hurt them; in which they generally succeed so well, that his eyes, by frequent languishing, soon lessen their idea of his fierceness, and so far abate their fears, that they venture to parley with him; and when they perceive him so different from what he hath been described, all gentleness, softness, kindness, tenderness, fondness, their dreadful apprehensions vanish in a moment; and now, (it being usual with the human mind to skip from one extreme to its opposite, as easily, and almost as suddenly, as a bird from one bough to another,) love instantly succeeds to fear. But as it happens to persons who have in their infancy been thoroughly frightened with certain no-persons called ghosts, that they retain their dread of those beings after they are convinced there are no such things; so these young ladies, though they no longer apprehend devouring, cannot so entirely shake off all that hath been instilled into them; they still entertain the idea of that censure which was so strongly imprinted on their tender minds, to which the declarations of abhorrence they every day hear from their companions greatly contribute. To avoid this censure, therefore, is now their only care; for which purpose they still pretend the same aversion to the monster: and the more they love him, the more ardently they counterfeit the antipathy. By the continual and constant practice of which deceit on others, they at length impose on themselves, and really believe they hate what they love. Thus indeed it happened to Lady Booby, HABIT, my good reader, hath so vast a prevalence over the human mind, that there is scarce any thing too strange or too strong to be asserted of it. The story of the miser, who, from long accustoming to cheat others, came at last to cheat himself, and with great delight and triumph picked his own pocket of a guinea to convey to his hoard, is not impossible or improbable. In like manner it fares with the practisers of deceit, who, from having long deceived their acquaintance, gain at last a power of deceiving themselves, and acquire that very opinion (however false) of their own abilities, excellencies, and virtues, into which they have for years, perhaps, endeavoured to, betray their neighbours. Now, reader, to apply this observation to my present purpose, thou must know, that, as the passion, generally called love, exercises most of the talents of the female or fair world; so in this they now and then discover a small inclination to deceit; for which thou wilt not be angry with the beautiful creatures, when thou hast considered, that at the age of seven, or something earlier, miss is instructed by her mother, that master is a very monstrous kind of animal, who will, if she suffers him to come too near her, infallibly eat her up, and grind her to pieces that so far from kissing or toying with him of her own accord, she must not admit him to kiss or toy with her and lastly, that she must never have any affection towards him; for if she should, all her friends in petticoats would : who loved Joseph long before she knew it; and who now loved him much more than she suspected. She had indeed, from the time of his sister's arrival in the quality of her niece, and from the instant she viewed him in the dress and character of a gentleman, began to conceive secretly a design which Love had concealed from herself, till a dream betrayed it to her. replied Joseph," that my parents have any power over my inclinations, nor am I obliged to sacrifice my happiness to their whim or ambition: besides, I shall be very sorry to see, that the unexpected advancement of my sister should so suddenly inspire them with this wicked pride, and make them despise their equals. I am resolved on no account to quit my dear Fanny, no, She had no sooner risen than she sent for her though I could raise her as high above her prenephew. When he came to her, after many com- sent station as you have raised my sister."pliments on his choice, she told him, he might "Your sister as well as myself," said Booby, perceive, in her condescension to admit her own "are greatly obliged to you for the comparison: servant to her table, that she looked on the fa- but, sir, she is not worthy to be compared in mily of Andrews as his relations, and indeed beauty to my Pamela, nor hath she half her hers; that as he had married into such a fami- merit. And besides, sir, as you civilly throw my ly, it became him to endeavour by all methods marriage with your sister in my teeth, I must to raise it as much as possible. At length she teach you the wide difference between us: My advised him to use all his art to dissuade Joseph fortune enabled me to please myself, and it from his intended match, which would still en- would have been as overgrown a folly in me to large their relation to meanness and poverty; have omitted it, as in you to do it."- "My forconcluding, that by a commission in the army, tune enables me to please myself likewise," said or some other genteel employment, he might Joseph; "for all my pleasure is centered in soon put young Mr Andrews on the foot of a Fanny; and whilst I have health, I shall be able gentleman; and that being once done, his ac- to support her with my labour in that station to complishments might quickly gain him an al- which she was born, and with which she is conliance which would not be to their discredit. tent."-"Brother," said Pamela, "Mr Booby Her nephew heartily embraced this proposal; advises you as a friend: and, no doubt, my paand finding Mr Joseph with his wife, at his re- pa and mamma will be of his opinion, and will turn to her chamber, he immediately began have great reason to be angry with you for dethus: "My love to my dear Pamela, brother, stroying what his goodness hath done, and throwwill extend to all her relations; nor shall I shew ing down our family again, after he hath raised them less respect than if I had married into the it. It would become you better, brother, to pray family of a duke. I hope I have given you some for the assistance of grace against such a passion, early testimonies of this, and shall continue to than to indulge it."-"Sure, sister, you are not give you daily more. You will excuse me, there- in earnest; I am sure she is your equal at least.” fore, brother, if my concern for your interest" She was my equal," answered Pamela ; " but makes me mention what may be, perhaps, disagreeable for you to hear: but I must insist upon it, that if you have any value for my alliance or my friendship, you will decline any thoughts of engaging farther with a girl, who is, as you are a relation of mine, so much beneath you. I know there may be at first some difficulty in your compliance, but that will daily diminish; and you will in the end sincerely thank me for my advice. I own indeed the girl is handsome; but beauty alone is a poor ingredient, and will make but an uncomfortable marriage."-"Sir," said Joseph, "I assure you her beauty is her least perfection; nor do I know a virtue which that young creature is not possessed of."-" As to her virtues," answered Mr Booby," you can yet be but a slender judge of them: but if she had never so many, you will find her equal in these among her superiors in birth and fortune, which now you are to esteem on a footing with yourself; at least I will take care they shall shortly be so, unless you prevent me by degrading yourself with such a match, a match I have hardly patience to think of, and which would break the hearts of your parents, who now rejoice in the expectation of seeing you make a figure in the world."-" I know not," I am no longer Pamela Andrews, I am now this gentleman's lady, and as such am above her. I hope I shall never behave with an unbecoming pride; but at the same time I shall always endeavour to know myself, and question not the assistance of grace to that purpose."-They were now summoned to breakfast, and thus ended their discourse for the present, very little to the satisfaction of any of the parties. Fanny was now walking in an avenue at some distance from the house, where Joseph had promised to take the first opportunity of coming to her. She had not a shilling in the world, and had subsisted ever since her return entirely on the charity of Parson Adams. A young gentleman, attended by many servants, came up to her, and asked her if that was not the Lady Booby's house before him? This indeed he well knew, but had framed the question for no other reason than to make her look up, and discover if her face was equal to the delicacy of her shape. He no sooner saw it than he was struck with amazement. He stopped his horse, and swore she was the most beautiful creature he ever beheld. Then instantly alighting, and delivering his horse to his servant, he rapt out half a dozen oaths that he would kiss her; to which the first sub mitted, begging he would not be rude: but he was not satisfied with the civility of a salute, nor even with the rudest attack he could make on her lips, but caught her in his arms, and endeavoured to kiss her breasts, which with all her strength she resisted; and, as our spark was not of the Herculean race, with some difficulty prevented. The young gentlemen being soon out of breath in the struggle, quitted her, and remounting his horse, called one of his servants to him, whom he ordered to stay behind with her, and make her any offers whatever, to prevail on her to return home with him in the evening, and to assure her he would take her into keep ing. He then rode on with his other servants, and arrived at the lady's house, to whom he was a distant relation, and was come to pay a visit. The trusty fellow, who was employed in an office he had been long accustomed to, discharged his part with all the fidelity and dexterity imaginable, but to no purpose. She was entirely deaf to his offers, and rejected them with the utmost disdain. At last the pimp, who had perhaps more warm blood about him than his master, began to solicit for himself; he told her, though he was a servant, he was a man of some fortune, which he would make her mistress of-and this without any insult to her virtue, for that he would marry her. She answered, if his master himself, or the greatest lord in the land, would marry her, she would refuse him. At last being weary with persuasions, and on fire with her charms, which would have almost kindled a flame in the bosom of an ancient philosopher, or modern divine, he fastened his horse to the ground, and attacked her with much more force than the gentleman had exerted. Poor Fanny would not have been able to resist his rudeness a long time; but the deity who presides over chaste love, sent her Joseph to her assistance. He no sooner came within sight, and perceived her struggling with a man, than like a cannon-ball, or like lightning, or any thing that is swifter, if any thing be, he ran towards her, and coming up just as the ravisher had torn her handkerchief from her breast, before his lips had touched that seat of innocence and bliss, he dealt him so lusty a blow in that part of his neck which a rope would have become with the utmost propriety, that the fellow staggered backwards; and perceiving he had to do with something rougher than the little, tender, trembling hand of Fanny, he quitted her, and turning about saw his rival, with fire flashing from his eyes, again ready to assail him; and indeed, before he could well defend himself, or return the first blow, received a second, which, had it fallen on that part of the stomach to which it was directed, would have been probably the last he would have had any occasion for; but the ravisher lifting up his hand, drove the blow upwards to his mouth, whence it dislodged three of his teeth; and now not conceiving any ex traordinary affection for the beauty of Joseph's person, nor being extremely pleased with this method of salutation, he collected all his force, and aimed a blow at Joseph's breast, which he artfully parried with one fist, so that it lost its force entirely in the air, and stepping one foot backward, he darted his fist so fiercely at his enemy, that had he not caught it in his hand, (for he was a boxer of no inferior fame,) it must have tumbled him on the ground. And now the ravisher meditated another blow, which he aimed at that part of the breast where the heart is lodged; Joseph did not catch it as before, yet so prevented its aim, that it fell directly on his nose, but with abated force. Joseph then moving both fist and foot forwards at the same time, threw his head so dexterously into the stomach of the ravisher, that he fell a lifeless lump on the field, where he lay many minutes breathless and motionless. When Fanny saw her Joseph receive a blow in his face, and blood running in a stream from him, she began to tear her hair, and invoke all human and divine power to his assistance. She was not, however, long under this affliction, before Joseph, having conquered his enemy, ran to her, and assured her he was not hurt; she then instantly fell on her knees, and thanked God that he had made Joseph the means of her rescue, and at the same time preserved him from being injured in attempting it. She offered with her handkerchief to wipe his blood from his face; but he seeing his rival attempting to recover his legs, turned to him, and asked him if he had enough; to which the other answered he had; for he believed he had fought with the devil instead of a man; and loosening his horse said, he should not have attempted the wench, if he had known she had been so well provided for. Fanny now begged Joseph to return with her to Parson Adams, and to promise that he would leave her no more. These were propositions so agreeable to Joseph, that, had he heard them, he would have given an immediate assent: but indeed his eyes were now his only sense; for you may remember, reader, that the ravisher had tore her handkerchief from Fanny's neck, by which he had discovered such a sight, that Joseph hath declared all the statues he ever beheld were so much inferior to it in beauty, that it was more capable of converting a man into a statue, than of being imitated by the greatest master of that art. This modest creature, whom no warmth in summer could ever induce to expose her charms to the wanton sun, a modesty to which, perhaps, they owed their inconceivable whiteness, had stood many minutes barenecked in the presence of Joseph, before her apprehension of his danger, and the horror of seeing his blood, would suffer her once to reflect on what concerned herself; till at last, when the cause of her concern had vanished, an admira |