converfation-and I truft I fhall not foon, if ever, forget the endearment and folemnity attending it.

On my going into the room very fhortly before the scene was clofed with her here, the expreffed great gladness at seeing me, and that she had been defiring me to come-I believe he was fenfible her end was juft approaching.-She expreffed great thankfulnefs to her dear young friend A. A. for the great care fhe had taken of her through the night. All that was alive in me was moved at this time, for I faw fhe was just going. Oh! how expreffively fhe looked upon me! how endearing her expreffions but she was foon paft converfation, and refigned her foul up to him who gave it, on the morning of the 5th of the 7th month 1791, dying of a putrid diforder, and was buried the 6th, in Friends burying ground in Providence.

Through divine help my mind was pretty well itayed, though deeply affected, and tenderly moved through her ficknefs, death, and burial. And thro' all, and after all, I have this confolation, that her foul was centred in divine love, and sweetened with a fore-taste of heavenly enjoyment. And though painful to me the feparation, and trying in many of my lonely moments; yet in God I have confidence and hope of confolation, and I dare not do any other than blefs his holy name in every trial; and if he but preferves my foul alive in him, and faithful in his covenant; all elfe I yield to his all-wife difpofal.

Many a mournful day and anxious night did I pafs through, in this my lonefome condition, and in a deep-felt fenfe of the buffetings of Satan within, and certain outward probations, in wifdom fuffered to befet me. I faw clearly I must be redeemed from many things wherein fome are taking fatisfaction, if I would live wholly unto God. I saw alfo

that

that he fuffered me to be many ways afflicted, in order that I might be fo redeemed. Sometimes it feemed as if I could fcarce live through my inward baptifms, and outward befetments; yet still preffed forward, until, in a time of deep distress, I found relief and confolation, in remembering, that fome of the moft diftreffing mornings of my life, have been followed by fome of the most happy and joyful evenings, and fome of the most melancholy evenings, by mornings of moft fubftantial gladness -therefore drew the following conclufion: I wilt Arive to moderate my joy in the moment of profperity-and in the hour of adverfity, I will endeavour to hope; for though forrow may remain for the night, yet joy cometh in the morning.

CHAP. X.

Extracts from his diary, and an account of his vifit into Connecticut.

I

7th mo. 12th,T FEEL that I ftand in need of a re1791. newal of my frength, in regard to religious life and progrefs, and am afresh confirmed, a chriftian's life is (as he minds his proper bufinefs) a continual warfare !-Oh my foul, watch and pray continually and think not to get forward rightly by an intermitting watch; a watch fometimes pretty well maintained; and anon, almost or quite wholly neglected; for be affured the enemy will make an inroad upon thee, if thou thus neglecteft the watch. O holy Father, and Fountain of light, life, and ftrength, I pray thee, enable me to watch and pray without ceafing.

16th day. Afflicted and not comforted; yet dare not let go my hold, nor look out to vifibles for enjoyment. My ftate feemed that of almoft total abftinence. 23d. Humbled and bowed in grateful proftration and reverence, in contemplating on the wonderful goodness of God to mankind through all ages, efpecially in opening and revealing, by his holy fpirit, the deep things of his heavenly kingdom to poor frail man.-27th, a day of great deliverance and enlargement in gospel authority in the miniftry and doctrine of Chrift-and fome faithful labours for the good of the brethren in a more private way-28th, fat under my own vine and figtree, where none could make afraid.-29th, I find yet need of dying daily, have in good degree fubmitted to it this day. Lord, let not thine hand fpare, nor thine eye pity, till thou bringeft forth judgment unto victory in me.-5th of 8th mo. I feel that my God has greatly weaned, and is weaning me; but I want to be able to fay, through and

1

with my Saviour, I greatly defire fully and unrefervedly to die to every thing that is not of the Father, whether it be of the world, the flesh, or the devil-in fhort, to know an overcoming of all evil, and all evil motions and defires, fo as that they may die at the root. And, indeed, this is the only true and effectual overcoming; for now alfo the ax is laid unto the root of the tree,'t not the branches only to lop and crop them, but to cut up the tree at the very root. And talk what men will of imputation-none are those overcomers to whom the proniife is made and will be performed, that they fhall eat of the hidden "manna't have a right to the tree of life'tt-re6 ceive a white ftone and a new name'-'enter in through the gates into the city, and be made pillars in the temple of God, that thall go no more out.' But those who maintain the warfare against fin, until Satan is wholly bruifed under them, and the law of the fpirit of life in Chrift Jefus fet them free from the law of fin and death.'-Oh! bleffed holy God, and Father of all our fure mercies, lead on, I pray thee, as thou haft begun, my exercifed foul, through all the remaining fteps and ftages of fanctification, until true judgment break' forth unto victory over all fin in me.

I have overcome the world."*

6th-Bleffed be the name of the Lord!-the work goes on, righteoufnefs is faid to the line, and judgment to the plumb-line, in my foul., Lord; fpare not, nor ftay thy hand, cleanfe thoroughly the floor of my heart, and burn up all the chaff in me with thy baptizing unquenchable fire.-19th, I feel much reconciled to the divine will, and therein to all my fufferings and afflictions, inward and outward; and do not wish them removed until they have done all, for which the Lord leads me into them.

them. And further, it is my defire, that I may never seek or take fatisfaction in any thing this world affords, otherwife than according to God's moft holy will; but that I may receive every bleffing, every favour, comfort, and confolation, as also every trial, affliction, crofs, and difappointment, as coming from his hand-and fo learn truly to rejoice evermore, and in every thing give thanks: So let it be, O Lord my God, for ever, may I, in every purfuit, attend to thy counfel and direction, may I fee in thy light, that it is neceffary and expedient that I be engaged in this or that, either fpiritual or temporal vocation-may 1 be ever ready and willing to pusfue every neceffary engagement, exercise and labour, of either kind-may a firm reliance on thy providential care and bleffing, prevent all improper hafte or anxiety-may I purfue, from day to day, the work and proper business of the day with fuitable diligence, moderation, and compofure, unanxious for the event, or for what may be tomorrow, or fome future time; but firmly believing that all things will, and do work together for the good of every foul that truly loves thee-and that the only right way for me to promote the profperity of my future days, is, to act well my part to-day, in thy counfel; leaving the difpofal of events to thy providential wisdom and goodness,-Thus will day unto day utter fpeech, and night unto night fhew knowledge.-One day's work, being rightly done, will tend towards the right opening to, and performing aright, the work and fervice of the fucceeding day and here will be found no occafion to anticipate the difficulties of the morrow, for fufficient

unto the day is the evil thereof.'+ On the one hand, there will be no time to be idle-nor on the other, to be over anxious or troubled.-If fparrows fall not to the ground without God's providencefurely he will never leave nor forfake the foul that trufteth

* Theff. v. 16 18.

+ Matt. vi. 34.