way of life,'+ divine life to the foul. This fomething, though they know not what it is, that checks them in fecret for evil, both before and after they yield to the temptation, warning them beforehand not to touch or tafte, and afterwards condemning them if they do fo; and inwardly inclining them to a life of religion and virtue-this is the very thing; dear young people whereby God worketh in you, to will and to do; and by which he will, if you cleave to it, and work with it, enable you to work out your own falvation with fear and trembling before him. Despise it not, do no violence to its motions; love it, cherish it, reverence it; hearken to its pleadings with you; give up without delay to its requirings, and obey its teachings. It is God's meffenger for good to thy immortal foul: its voice in thy streets is truly the voice of the living God: its call is a kind invitation to thee from the throne of grace. Hear it, and it will lead thee; obey it, and it will fave thee: it will fave thee from the power of fin and Satan: it will finally lead thee to an inheritance incorruptible in the manfions of reft, the house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. I entreat you, as you love your own fouls, and prize an everlasting falvation; I warn yeu, by the dreadful fruits of difobedience, by the pangs, remorfe and fufferings of my own foul for fin and tranfgreffion. Had I fteadily obeyed the truth in my inward parts; had I attended fingly and faithfully to this divine monitor, my portion had been peace; my cup, a cup of confolation. I might have rejoiced and fung, whereas I have had to mourn and weep., For as I grew to fifteen and upwards, in violation to clear inward convictions, in oppofition to the dictates of the Holy Spirit, I began to run into company, learned + Prov. vi. 23. learned to dance and play at cards, and took great delight therein. I was often deeply condemned, and often strove to ftifle the witness, and perfuade myself there was no harm in any of these things. My Father fometimes reproved me in those days for my conduct; but finning against divine light and vifitation, hardened me againft his advice. I grew more and more vain, proud, airy and wanton, I put myself in the way of much evil communication; and it mournfully corrupted good manners. My tafte for pleasure and amufement grew keen, my fpirits were low and languid when alone, and I rushed into company and merriment for alleviation. Thus I went on frolicking and gaming, and fpending my precious time in vanity. Often at night, or in the night, and fometimes near break of day, I have returned home from my merry meetings grievously condemned, diftreffed and afhamed; withing I had not gone into fuch company, and refolving to do fo no more; but foon my refolutions failed me, and away I went again and again, and thus continued making ftill greater ftrides in folly than before. The Lord followed me clofe, in mercy, and often brake in powerfully upon me, turning all my mirth into mourning; yet I ftill got over the holy witness, did defpite to the fpirit of grace, and repaired again to my haunts of diverfion and merriment. Sometimes when I have ftood upon the floor to dance, with a partner by the hand, before all were quite ready, God has arifen in judgment, and fmitten me to the very heart. Oh! I ftill feelingly remember his appearance within me, when none knew the agony of my foul. I felt ready to fink under the weight of condemnation and anguish; but refolutely muftering all the ftoutnefs I was master of, I brazened it out, until the mufick called me to the dance, and then I foon drowned the voice of conviction, became merry, and caroufed among my companions in diffipation, until time urged a difmiffion of our jovial affembly, and called me to return, often lonely, to my father's houfe, my outward habitation. Oh me, how fared it with me then? I affure thee, reader, I have not forgotten those fad and mournful walks at the conclufion of my midnight revellings. I have been broken down in deep abafement and felfabhorrence; have come to a full ftand, stopped and fat down on a stump, ftone or log, by the way; wrung my hands, ftrewed my tears before the Lord, in forrow and extremity of anguish, bordering almost on defperation. I have begged forgiveness; implored affiftance; vowed amendment; obtained fome relief; and returned home in hope of reformation. But alas, alas! my refolutions were written as it were in fand; the power of habit had enflaved me; and almost the next invitation of my affociates, overcame all my engagements; the eagerness of defires for divertisements and paftimes brake through all the fanctions of vows; and violated the folemnity of facred promises to my God. I rushed again into tranfgreffion, as a horse rufhes into the battle; again and again I took my fwing, and drank my fill: and again and again remorfe and compunction feized upon me: Adored for ever be the name of the Lord, he forfook me not; but followed me ftill clofer and clofer, and founded the alarm louder and louder in mine ears. There was in me an immortal part, which his love was towards; the recovery of which, from the thraldom of fin and corruption, his goodness engaged him to feek by mercy and by judgment; frowns and fmiles; chaftifements and endearments; and all in love inexpreffible. Thus dealt he with me. When I turned at his reproofs, he smiled upon me, and relieved my foul's anxiety; anxiety; but when I again revolted, his rod was lifted up in fatherly correction. The ftill fmall voice was uttered in my dwelling, as in the cool of the day, when a little retired from noife and commotion, Adam, where art thou? There was no hiding from him, whofe penetrating eye no fecret can escape; and whofe aim in reproving was only to fave. He ftill reproved my wanderings, and pointed out the right way, according to fcripture declaration, thou fhalt hear a voice behind thee, faying, this is the way, walk in it.' Indeed the way was fhewn me; it was often plainly caft up before me; but I would not walk in it. I knew my Lord's will, but did it not; mine awn, I ftill delighted in the indulgence of. O! that others may efcape my load of guilt; and may I fay, my bed of hell, or inward tormenting agony, by a timely fubmiffion to the reproofs of inftruction. Sometimes I spent near all the firft-day of the week, when I should have been at meeting, in playing cards, idle, if not diffolute conversation, and other vain amusements; returning home at night in condemnation, and fometimes fighing and crying, and yet thro' all this the Lord preferved me from hard drinking, though often in the way of temptation and folicitation to it. Swearing I also mostly refrained from, Jefting, Joking and vain converfation, I went confiderable lengths in; and fometimes joined the foremost in filthy and obfcene difcourfes. Then again great fhame and felf-abhorrence would overwhelm me; again I vowed, promifed and renewed my covenant; but all in vain; I had not got deep enough; nor were my covenants made or renewed in the right ability; but too much in my own ftrength and creaturely refolutions; fo they foon were broken. Sometimes I held out a a week or two; other times only a day or two. Thus time paffed on; and, with an increase of years years, I found an increafing propensity to wantonnefs and diffipation. But bleffed be the God of my falvation, he proportionately increased my fenfe of guilt and condemnation. I had seasons of very serious confideration upon religion. What inftructions I had outwardly received, were mostly in the way of Friends; but when I came near to man's eftate, falling in company with some of the Baptift fociety, I was drawn to attend their meetings in Providence. Friends meetings were oftner held in filence than fuited my itching ear. I loved to hear words, began to grow inquifitive, and to fearch pretty deeply into doctrines and tenets of religion; and the Baptift preachers filled my ears with words, and my head with arguments and diftinctions: but my heart was little or not at all improved by them., I almoft forfook the meetings of Friends, except yearly meetings, and meetings appointed by travellers in the fervice of the gofpel. But when I went to these, O! how livingly I ftill remember the heavenly and heart-tendering impreffions I fometimes received under the animating teftimonies delivered in the life of the gofpel. Here my heart was helped, though my bead was lefs amufed than among the Baptifts: however, as I knew not clearly what caufed the difference; as Friends meetings remained ftill often filent; and as I ftill wifhed the gratification of argumentative; fyftematic difcourfes; I ftill pretty diligently attended the Baptist meeting; and, in my most religious seasons, I began to think of being baptifed in water. For the head-work fo far outrun the heart-work, during my attendance of these meetings, that I became convinced in fpeculation, that that outward performance was an ordinance of Chrift; though I have fince feen, that it never was ordained by Jefus; but was a forerunning, preparatory and decreasing inftitution, and has long |