to such a servile state, and thereby lose the glorious power of conferring happiness on the deserving; which surely is one of the highest pleasures that a generous mind can know; a pleasure, sir, which you have oftener experienced than thousands of gentlemen: And which, may you still continue to experience for a long, long, and happy succession of years to come, is the prayer of one, the most obliged of all others in her own person, as well as in the persons of her dearest relations; and who owes to this glorious beneficence the honour she boasts of being

Your ever affectionate and grateful

LETTER XCV.

MRS B TO MR B

P. B

But now, my dear Mr B, if you will indulge me in a letter or two more, preparative to my little book that I mentioned, I will take the liberty to touch upon one or two other places, wherein I differ from this learned gentleman. But, first, permit me to observe, that if parents are, above all things, to avoid giving bad examples to their children, they will be no less careful to shun the practice of such fond fathers and mothers as are wont to indulge their children in bad habits, and give them their head, at a time when, like wax, their tender minds may be moulded into what shape they please. This is a point that, if it please God, I will carefully attend to, because it is the foundation on which the superstructure of the whole future man is to be erected. For, according as he is indulged or checked in his childish follies, a ground is laid for his future happiness or misery; and if once they are suffered to become habitual to him, it cannot but be expected, that they will grow up with him, and that they will hardly ever be eradicated. "Try it," says Mr Locke, speaking to this very point, "in a dog, or a horse, or any other creature, and see whether the ill and resty tricks they have learned when young, are easily to be mended when they are knit: And yet none of these creatures are half so wilful and proud, or half so desirous to be masters of themselves, as men."

And this brings me, dear sir, to the head of punishments, in which, as well as in the article of rewards, which I have touched upon, I have little objection to what Mr Locke advances.

But permit me, however, to premise, that I am exceedingly pleased with the method laid down by this excellent writer, rather to shame the child out of his fault, than beat him; which latter serves generally for nothing but to harden his mind.

Obstinacy, and telling a lie, and committing a wilful fault, and then persisting in it, are, I agree with this gentleman, the only causes for which

the child should be punished with stripes: And I admire the reasons he gives against too rigorous and severe treatment of children.

But I will give Mr Locke's words, to which I have some objection.

"It may be doubted," says he, "concerning whipping, when, as the last remedy, it comes to be necessary, at what time, and by whom, it should be done; whether presently, upon the committing the fault, while it is yet fresh and hot.-I think it should not be done presently," adds he, "lest passion mingle with it; and so, though it exceed the just proportion, yet it lose of its due weight: for even children discern whenever we do things in a passion."

I must beg leave, dear sir, to differ from Mr Locke in this point; for I think it ought rather to be a rule with parents, who shall chastise their children, to conquer what would be extreme in their own passion on this occasion, (for those parents, who cannot do it, are very unfit to be punishers of the wayward passions of their children,) than to defer the punishment, espe cially if the child knows its fault has reached its parent's ear. It is otherwise, methinks, giving the child, if of an obstinate disposition, so much more time to harden its mind, and bid defiance to its punishment.

Just now, dear sir, your Billy is brought into my presence, all smiling, crowing to come to me, and full of heart-cheering promises; and the subject I am upon goes to my heart. Surely, surely, I can never beat your Billy!-Dear little life of my life! how can I think that thou canst ever deserve it, or that I can ever inflict it! -No, my baby, that shall be thy papa's task, if ever thou art so heinously naughty; and whatever he does, must be right.-Pardon my foolish fondness, dear sir!--I will proceed.

If, then, the fault be so atrocious as to deserve whipping, and the parent be resolved on this exemplary punishment, the child ought not, as I imagine, to come into one's presence without meeting with it: For else, a fondness too natural to be resisted, will probably get the upperhand of one's resentment, and how shall one be able to whip the dear creature one had ceased to be angry with? Then, after he has once seen one without meeting his punishment, will he not be inclined to hope for connivance at his fault, unless it should be repeated? And may he not be apt (for children's resentments are strong) to impute to cruelty, a correction, (when he thought the fault had been forgotten,) that should always appear to be inflicted with reluctance, and through motives of love?

If, from anger at his fault, one should go above the due proportion, (I am sure I might be trusted for this!) let it take its course! How barbarously, methinks, I speak! He ought to feel the lash, first, because he deserves it, poor little soul! Next, Because it is proposed to be exemplary. And, lastly, because it is not intended to be often

love and respect, or by whose precepts we would have it directed, to be the punisher of its faults, or to do any harsh or disagreeable office to it.

For my own part, dear sir, I must take the liberty to declare, that if the parent were not to inflict the punishment himself, I think it much better it should be given him, in the parent's presence, by the servant of the lowest consideration in the family, and whose manners and example one would be the least willing of any other he should follow. Just as the common executioner, who is the lowest and most flagitious officer of the commonwealth, and who frequently deserves, as much as the criminal, the punishment he is chosen to inflict, is pitched upon to perform, as a mark of greater ignominy, those sentences which are intended as examples

to deter others from the commission of heinous crimes. And this was the method the Almighty took, when he was disposed to correct severely his chosen people: For, in that case, he generally did it by the hands of the most profligate nations around them, as we read in many places of the Old Testament.

But the following rule among a thousand others equally excellent, I admire in Mr Locke: "When," says he, " (for any misdemeanour,) the father or mother looks sour on the child, every one else should put on the same coldness to him, and nobody give him countenance till forgiveness asked, and a reformation of his fault has set him right again, and restored him to his former credit. If this were constantly observed," adds he, "I guess there would be little need of blows or chiding: Their own ease or satisfaction would quickly teach children to court commendation, and avoid doing that which they found every body condemned, and they were sure to suffer for, without being chid or beaten. This would teach them modesty and shame, and they would quickly come to have a natural abhorrence for that which they found made them slighted and neglected by every body."

This affords me, dear sir, a pretty hint: For if ever your charming Billy shall be naughty, what will I do, but proclaim throughout your worthy family, that the little dear is in disgrace! And one shall shun him; another shall decline answering him; a third shall say, No, master, I cannot obey you till your mamma is pleased with you; a fourth, Who shall mind what little masters bid them do, when little masters won't mind what their mammas say to them? And when the dear little soul finds this, he will come in my way, (and I see, pardon me, my dear B, he has some of his papa's spirit already, indeed he has!) and I will direct myself with double kindness to your beloved Davers, and to my Miss Goodwin, and take no notice at all of the dear creature, if I can help it, till I can see his papa (forgive my boldness) banished from his little sullen brow, and all his mam

ma rise to his eyes. And when his musical tongue shall be unlocked to own his fault, and promise amendment-O, then, how shall I clasp him to my bosom! and tears of joy, I know, will meet his tears of penitence!

How these flights, dear sir, please a body!— What delights have those mammas, (which some fashionable ladies are quite unacquainted with,) who can make their dear babies, and their first educations, their entertainment and diversion! To watch the dawnings of reason in them, to direct their little passions, as they shew themselves, to this or that particular point of benefit and use; and to prepare the sweet virgin soil of their minds to receive the seeds of virtue and goodness so early, that, as they grow up, one need only now a little pruning, and now a little watering, to make them the ornaments and delights of the garden of this life! And then their pretty ways, their fond and grateful endearments, some new beauty every day rising to observation-O, my dearest Mr B- ! whose enjoyments and pleasures are so great, as those of such mothers as can bend their minds, two or three hours every day, to the duties of the nursery!

I have a few other things to observe upon Mr Locke's Treatise, which, when I have done, I shall read, admire, and improve by the rest, as my years and experiences advance; of which, in my proposed little book, I shall give you ter proofs than I am able to do at present; raw, crude, and indigested as the notions of so young a mamma must needs be.

bet

But these shall be the subjects of another letter; for now I am come to the pride and the pleasure I always have, when I subscribe myself, dearest sir,

Your ever dutiful and grateful
P. B-

LETTER XCVI.

MRS B TO MR B

DEAR SIR,

MR LOCKE gives a great many very pretty instructions relating to the play-games of children; but I humbly presume to object to what he says in one or two places.

He would not indulge them in any playthings, but what they make themselves, or endeavour to make. "A smooth pebble, a piece of paper, the mother's bunch of keys, or any thing they cannot hurt themselves with," he rightly says, serves as much to divert little children, as those more chargeable and curious toys from the shops, which are presently put out of order and broken."

66

These play-things may certainly do well enough, as he observes, for little ones: But, methinks, to a person of easy circumstances,

since the making these toys employs the industrious poor, the buying them for the child might be dispensed with, though they were easily broken; and especially as they are of all prices, and some less costly and more durable than others.

"Tops, gigs, battledors," Mr Locke observes, "which are to be used with labour, should indeed be procured them-not for variety, but exercise; but if they had a top, the scourge stick and leather-strap should be left to their own making and fitting."

But may I presume to say, That whatever be the good Mr Locke proposes by this, it cannot be equal to the mischief children may do themselves in making these play-things? For must they not have implements to work with? And is not a knife, or other edged tool, without which it is impossible they can make or shape a scourge-stick, or any of their play-things, a fine instrument in a child's hands? This advice is the reverse of the caution warranted from all antiquity, that it is dangerous to meddle with edged tools: And I am afraid the tutor must often act the surgeon, and follow the indulgence with a styptic and a plaster; and the young gentleman's hands might be so often bound up, that it might indeed, perhaps, be one way to cure him of his earnest desire to play; but I can hardly imagine any other good that it can do him: For, I doubt the excellent consequences proposed by our author from this doctrine, such as to teach the child moderation in his desires, application, industry, thought, contrivance, and good husbandry; qualities that, as he observes, will be useful to him when he is a man, are too remote to be engrafted upon such beginnings: although it must be confessed, that, as Mr Locke wisely observes, good habits and industry cannot be too early inculcated.

But then, sir, may I ask, are not the very plays and sports to which children accustom themselves, whether they make their own playthings or not, equivalent to the work or labour of grown persons? Yes, sir, I will venture to say they are, and more than equivalent to the exercises and labour of many.

Mr Locke advises, that the child's play-things should be as few as possible, in which I entirely agree with him: That they should be in his tutor's power, who is to give him but one at once. But since it is the nature of the human mind to covet most what is prohibited, and to set light by what is in its own power; I am half doubtful, (only that Mr Locke says it, and the matter may not be so very important, as other points, in which I have taken the liberty to differ from that gentleman,) whether the child's absolute possession of his own play-things in some little repository, of which he may be permitted to keep the key, especially if he make no bad use of the privilege, would not make him more indifferent to them: while the con

trary conduct might possibly enhance his value of them. And if, when he had done with any play-thing, he were obliged to put it into its allotted place, and were accustomed to keep account of the number and places of them severally; this would teach him order, and at the same time instruct him to keep a proper account of them, and to avoid being a squanderer or waster: And if he should omit to put his playthings in their places, or be careless of them, the taking them away for a time, or threatening to give them to others, would make him be more heedful.

Mr Locke says, "That he has known a child so distracted with the number and variety of his play-things, that he tired his maid every day to look them over: and was so accustomed to abundance, that he never thought he had enough, but was always asking, What more? What new thing shall I have? A good introduction," adds he, ironically, "to moderate desires, and the ready way to make a contented happy man!"

All that I shall offer to this is, that there are few men so philosophical as one would wish them to be; much less children. But no doubt that this variety engaged the child's activity; which, of the two, might be turned to better purposes than sloth or indolence; and if the maid was tired, it might be because she was not so much alive as the child; and perhaps this part of the grievance might not be so great, because, if she was his attendant, 'tis probable she had nothing else to do.

However, in the main, as Mr Locke says, it is no matter how few playthings the child is indulged with: But yet I can hardly persuade myself, that plenty of them can have such bad consequences, as the gentleman apprehends; and the rather, because they will excite his attention, and promote his industry and activity. His inquiry after new things, let him have few or many, is to be expected as a consequence of those natural desires, which are implanted in him, and will every day increase: But this may be observed, that as he grows in years, he will be above some playthings, and so the number of the old ones will be always reducible, perhaps in a greater proportion than the new ones will increase.

Mr Locke observes, on the head of good-breeding, that "There are two sorts of ill-breeding; the one a sheepish bashfulness, and the other a misbecoming negligence and disrespect in our carriage; both which," says he, " are avoided by duly observing this one rule, not to think meanly of ourselves, and not to think meanly of others." I think, as Mr Locke explains this rule, it is an excellent one. But on this head I would beg leave to observe, that however discommendable a bashful temper is, in some instances, where it must be deemed a weakness of the mind; yet, in my humble opinion, it is generally the mark of an ingenuous one, and is

always to be preferred to an undistinguishing and hardy confidence, which, as it seems to me, is the genuine production of invincible igno

rance.

What is faulty in it, which Mr Locke calls sheepishness, should indeed be shaken off, as soon as possible, because it is an enemy to merit in its advancement in the world: But, sir, were I to choose a companion for your Billy, as he grows up, I should not think the worse of the youth, who, not having had the opportunities of knowing men, or seeing the world, had this defect. On the contrary, I should be apt to look upon it as an outward fence, or enclosure, as I may say, to his virtue, which might keep off the lighter attacks of immorality, the Hussars of vice, as I may say, who are not able to carry on a formal siege against his morals; and I should expect such a one to be docile, humane, good-humoured, diffident of himself, and therefore most like ly to improve as well in mind as behaviour: While a hardened mind, that never doubts it self, must be a stranger to its own infirmities, and, suspecting none, is impetuous, over-bearing, incorrigible, and, if rich, a tyrant: if not, possibly an invader of other men's properties; or, at least, such a one as allows itself to walk so near the borders of injustice, that, where self is concerned, it hardly ever does right things.

Mr Locke proposes (§ 148,) a very pretty method to cheat children, as it were, into learning: But then he adds, "There may be dice and playthings, with the letters on them, to teach children the alphabet by playing." And in another place, (§ 151,) "I know a person of great quality-who, by pasting the six vowels (for in our language y is one) on the six sides of a die, and the remaining eighteen consonants on the sides of three other dice, has made this a play for his children, that he shall win, who at one cast throws most words on these four dice; whereby his eldest son, yet in coats, has played himself into spelling with great eagerness, and without once having been chid for it, or forced to it."

I must needs say, my dear Mr B, that I had rather your Billy should be a twelvemonth backwarder for want of this method, than forwarded by it. For what may not be apprehend ed from so early allowing, or rather inculcating, the use of dice and gaming upon the minds of children? Let Mr Locke himself speak to this in his § 208, and I should be glad to be able to reconcile the two passages in this excellent author. "As to cards and dice," says he, "I think the safest and best way, is never to learn any play upon them, and so to be incapacitated for these dangerous temptations, and encroaching wasters of useful time."-And, he might have added, of the noblest estates and fortunes; while sharpers and scoundrels have been lifted into distinction upon their ruins. Yet, in § 153, Mr Locke proceeds to give particular directions in relation to the dice he recommends.

But, after all, if some innocent plays were fixed upon to cheat children into reading, that, as he says, should look as little like a task as possible, it must needs be of use for that purpose. But let every gentleman, who has a fortune to lose, and who, if he games, is on a foot with the vilest company, who generally have nothing at all to risk, tremble at the thoughts of teaching his son, though for the most laudable purposes, the early use of dice and gaming.

But, dear sir, permit me to say, how much I am charmed with a hint in Mr Locke, which makes your Pamela hope she may be of greater use to your children, even as they grow up, than she could ever have flattered herself to be.-'Tis a charming paragraph! I must not skip one word of it. Thus it begins, and I will observe upon it as I go along: "$177. But under whose care soever a child is put to be taught," says Mr Locke, "during the tender and flexible years of his life, this is certain, it should be one, who thinks Latin and language the least part of education."

How agreeable is this to my notions; which I durst not have avowed, but after so excellent a scholar! For I have long had the thought, that a great deal of precious time is wasted to little purpose in the attaining of Latin. Mr HI think, says, he was ten years in endeavouring to learn it, and, as far as I can find, knows nothing at all of the matter neither!-Indeed he lays that to the wicked picture in his grammar, which he took for granted, (as he has said several times, as well as once written,) was put there to teach boys to rob orchards, instead of improving their minds in learning, or common honesty.

But, (for this is too light an instance for the subject,) Mr Locke proceeds: "One who knowing how much virtue and a well-tempered soul is to be preferred to any sort of learning or language," What a noble writer is this!"makes it his chief business to form the mind of his scholars, and give that a right disposition." [Ay, there, dear sir, is the thing! "Which, if once got, though all the rest should be neglected," charmingly observed!] "would in due time” without wicked dice, I hope]" produce all the rest; and which, if it be not got and settled, so as to keep out ill and vitious habits, languages and sciences, and all the other accomplishments of education, will be to no purpose, but to make the worse or more dangerous man." [Now comes the place I am so much delighted with!]

And, indeed, whatever stir there is made about getting of Latin, as the great and difficult business, his mother" [O thank you, thank you, dear sir, for putting this excellent author into my hands!" may teach it him herself, if she will but spend two or three hours in a day with him,"

If she will! Never fear, dear sir, but I will, with the highest pleasure in the world!" and make him read the Evangelists in Latin to her."