you say, Esquire White ?' 'I cannot take care of them now; but I will pay you for all damages. Well,' said he, 'you will find that a hard thing, I guess.'

"So off he went, and I heard a terrible squalling among the geese. The next news from the geese was that three of them were missing. My children went and found them terribly mangled and dead, and thrown into the bushes.

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'Now,' said I, 'all keep still, and let me punish him.' In a few days the shoemaker's hogs broke into my corn. I saw them, but let them remain a long time. At last I drove them all out, and picked up the corn which they had torn down and fed them with it in the road. By this time the shoemaker came in great haste after them. "Have you seen any thing of my hogs?' said he. Yes, sir; you will find them yonder, eating some corn which they tore down

in my field.' 'In your field?' Yes, sir,' said I; 'hogs love corn,

you know they were made to eat.' they done?' 'Õ, not much,' said I.

'How much mischief have

"Well, off he went to look, and estimated the damage to be equal to a bushel and a-half of corn.

"Oh, no,' said I, 'it can't be.'

'Yes,' said the shoemaker; and I will pay you every cent of damage.' ‘No,' said I, ‘you shall pay me nothing. My geese have been a great trouble to

you.' The shoemaker blushed and went home. The next winter, when we came to settle, the shoemaker determined to pay me for my corn. 'No,' said I; 'I shall take nothing.'

"After some talk we parted; but in a day or two I met him in the road, and fell into conversation in the most friendly manner. But when I started on he seemed loth to move, and I paused. For a moment both of us were silent. At last he said: 'I have something laboring on my mind.' 'Well, what is it?' Those geese.

I killed three of your geese, and shall never rest until you know how I feel. I am sorry.' And the tears came in his eyes. 'Oh, well,' said I, 'never mind; I suppose my geese were very provoking.'

I never took any thing of him for it; but whenever my cattle broke into his field after this, he seemed glad; because he could show how patient he could be.

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Now," said the narrator, "conquer yourself, and you can conquer with kindness where you can conquer in no other way.”

DYSPEPSIA.

A WEALTHY manufacturer from the west of Scotland, while at Edinburgh on business, called upon Dr. Gregory for his advice. He was a man of middle stature, rather corpulent, with a rosy complexion, and whose exterior altogether spoke the comfortable liver. After seating himself, the following dialogue ensued:

GENTLEMAN.—Well, Dr. Gregory, I ha' come up to Edinbro' in the way o' business, and I just thought I would take your advice about my health.

DOCTOR.-Your health, sir! What's the matter with you ? I'm no just sae weel i' the stomach as I'd like to be.' "The stomach! I suppose you are a drunkard or a glutton, then, sir.”

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Na, na, Dr. Gregory, ye canna say that-ye canna say that; ye maun ken that I'm a sober mon and a temperate mon, and a deacon of the kirk, as my worthy father was afore me."

'Well, let us see. What do you eat and drink? What do you take for breakfast ?"

"I take coffee or tea, wi' toast, and a fresh egg, or a bit o' salmon, though I have no' much appetite for breakfast.'

Yes; and then you take something by way of lunch between breakfast and dinner.”

'I canna say I care ower much about the lunch; but can take a bit o' bread and cheese, and a glass o' ale, if it be there, but canna say I care ower much about it.

"Well, what do you eat for dinner ?"

O, I'm no very particular, though I maun say I like my dinner."

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'I suppose you take soup first ?”

Yes, I canna say, I don't like my soup."

"And a glass of porter or brandy and water with it?"

"Yes, I like a glass o' something with the soup."

"And then you have fish, or beef and mutton, with vegetables ?" "Yes."

"And a glass of ale or porter with them ?"

"Yes, I take a glass o' ale now and then, wi' my meat."

"And then you have boiled fowl and bacon, or something of that

sort, I suppose ?"

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'I

I maun say I like a bit o' fowl and bacon now and then." "And a glass of something with them ?"

"Yes."

"And after the fowl you have pudding ?”

"I'm na fond o' pudding, but I can take a bit, if it be there.”

"And you must drink wine with the pudding ?”

I canna tak ower much o' the wine; but if I ha' a friend wi' me,

I take a glass or so.”

"And then you have cheese or nuts ?"

Yes, the gude wife is ower fond o' them; but I canna say I care much about them."

"But you take a glass of wine or two with your nuts ?”

Yes, a glass or two."

Well, you do not finish your dinner without whisky punch ?" "I find my dinner sets better on my stomach with a little punch; so I tak a glass or so.”

"And you have tea, I suppose ?"

Yes, I maun take my tea wi' the gude wife."

"And a glass of something with it ?”

Yes, I can take a bit o' something if it be there."

" But you

do not go to bed without your supper?''

Na, na, Gregory, I canna say I like to gang to bed without my wee bit supper.'

"And what do you eat for supper?"

'O, a bit o' any thing-a bit o' salmon, or boiled tongue, or cold fowl."

"And a glass of something with it ?”

"Yes."

"And can you go to bed without a night-cap of hot punch ?" "I maun say I sleep better for a glass o' hot punch, though I canna say I'm ower fond o' the habit.

"Well, sir, you're a fine fellow! You come to me with a lie in your mouth, and tell me you are a sober man, and a temperate man, and a deacon of the kirk, as your worthy father was before you; and you make yourself out, by your own statement, to be a glutton, and a wine-bibber, and a whisky-tippler, and a beer-swiller, and a drinker of that most abominable of all compositions, called punch. Go home, sir, and reform yourself, and become temperate in your eating and drinking, and you will have no need of my advice."

THE MISER IN THE WELL.

An old bachelor, possessed of a fortune of $50,000, meeting a friend one day began to harangue him very learnedly upon the detestable sin of avarice, and gave the following instance of it: "About three years ago," said he, "by a very odd accident I fell into a well, and was absolutely within a very few minutes of perishing before I could prevail upon an unconscious dog of a laborer, who happened to be within hearing of my cries, to help me out for a shilling. The fellow was so rapacious as to insist upon having twenty-five cents, for above a quarter of an hour, and I verily believe he would not have abated me a single farthing if he had not seen me at the last gasp; and I determined rather to die than submit to his extortion!"

HENRY VIII. AND THE ABBOT OF READING.

HENRY the Eighth having been hunting in Windsor Forest, went down about dinner time to the Abbey of Reading, where, disguising himself as one of the king's guard, he was invited to the Abbot's table. Here, his tooth being whetted by the keen air of the forest,