A. "Au, bless yer soul, sir, us be all antics oursells now, sir, all ov us."

In a country town not much more than twenty miles from Launceston lived a man who had had the misfortune to have lost his nose, and who occupied a small official position in the town. A neighbour, coming in from an adjoining parish, had in a fight a few days previously lost a portion of his ear. On their meeting one another the first-mentioned official, it being Christmas time, said, "A happy New Year to you, sir," not knowing at all of the misfortune the other had met with. The neighbour, thinking it was a slur on his short-coming, gave as a sharp retort, "A happy new nose to you." It took their friends some time to part them, and history says they never spoke afterwards.

There is rather an amusing story told of a very deaf old man who had been induced to face the altar-rails with rather an elderly spinster, who was his housekeeper. The clergyman going through the Marriage Service said: 'Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded wife," etc.

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The old man said, “I can't yer a word w'at 'e's saying, Betsy. W'at's 'e sayin'?"

Betsy replied, "'E's asking if you'll have me for your lawful wedded wive."

He does not hear. "What is it he sayth? What be you saying?"

Betsy replied, “'E's askin' if you'll 'ave me for your lawful wive."

The old man retorts with a grunt, "Um course I will. I've said so. Idn't this w'at you've a-dragged me yer

There's an old saying which is very frequently used in the country: "If you can't schemey, you must louster" -"louster" being the Devonshire word for work. An old man speaking of a very pretty young lady said, "Her face is as smooth as a wont wont or want being the old West-Country name for "mole," which we all of us know has a remarkably smooth soft skin.

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A small child walking with her mother, on seeing a gentleman who was suffering very much from rheumatism, and very much crippled with it, said, "Oh, mummy, mummy, hasn't Mr. So-and-so got a squint' in his legs!

An old man summoned in a police-court for the non

maintenance of his third wife gave as his reason, I wanted her to nuss me, but I've got to nuss of she, and I wan't have it 'tisn't as I expected."

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An old groom was heard philosophizing as to his work of looking after horses and a garden, and was heard to say to himself as follows: One hoss and a bit ov garden will du, but with three hosses the garden is a bit ov a 'over-plush.'"

Another old man, speaking of some one whom he had not a particular liking for, said, "Au, 'e was a pritty clever ol' chap, 'e was-'e could always foresee things afterwards."

An old woman in a village, in speaking of some people with whom she had had a quarrel, wound up her somewhat choleric remark by saying, "Well, they du say it du take all zorts ov folk tu make up the world. Thank the Lord, I baint wan ov they.'

The following stories may be interesting to the legal profession :

A country builder had arranged for a loan to be made on one of his houses, and was instructing his solicitor as to the necessary document, and, as a collateral or additional security, was going to give a second charge on some other houses, and he explained "that they there houses is to be charged by way of collapsible' security,” meaning, of course, as a collateral or additional security for

his loan.

6

A countryman consulting his solicitor with regard to the proving the will of his deceased mother, in the course of the interview, after having the date of death and various other things, the solicitor said:

S. "What did your mother die possessed of?"

A. "Au, bless 'e, sir, 'er wadden possessed a'tawl."
S. "No, no. What was she possessed of?

A. "Au, I s'pose you mean w'at did 'er die ov? Au, 'twas drapsy."

The solicitor had to explain that he did not want to know what complaint she died of, but to know what property she left.

An owner was proposing to let his house, of rather peculiar build, and the solicitor remarked, "Well, I don't think the house will let very quickly." To which the owner replied, "No, I think it is one of those that will bide addled a goodish time."

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As the word addled is applied to useless or nonfertile eggs, the reply is not so very inappropriate.

A very irate, irascible old gentleman, who had rented a very small country house, finding somebody trespassing on what he considered his own ground, said, attacking him very fiercely, "What do you mean by coming here upon my land, and by your dogs running all about my preserves?" was not soothed when the supposed trespasser replied, "I never knew you had any land except in your flower-pots, and as to your preserves they're in your jampots."

In a town not much more than twenty miles from Launceston an enterprising tradesman had started a shop with "The Original Café " over the front in Old English lettering. An old lady seeing these words in Old English, spelt them out as "The Original Calf," and said, What a very funny name for a taffee shop!"

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STRIKING MATCHES.

The story goes that an old lady living some five or six miles out in the country one market-day purchased some matches. They got damp on the way home, and would not light readily. The next market-day she took them in and complained they would not light. The tradesman, taking the box, which had then dried, took out some matches and struck one or two readily against his trousers. Why, they light all right," he said, as every match flared. The old woman said, "Try another," and another was tried with a like result. "There," said he, "what do you say to that?" Say, say! said the old woman. Say, that if you think I'm going to trapse in from Sourton Down-nigh three miles-to strike the matches against your trousers every time I wants to light me fire, you makes a mistake. You must take 'em back. I shan't do it! I won't have 'em! I wants my money back."

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A story is told of two old cronies who had been to market, and had "marketed" bravely.

They lumbered along home. One, who was rather worse than his friend, fell down and went to sleep. His friend, game to the last, tried to wake him, and pulled him about, trying to get him on his legs, but all his efforts were unavailing. He is overheard apostrophizing him : Get up, do 'ee, Bill; get up, you can if you try a bit. do 'ee-you'm conscientious now, baint 'ee?

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Now

THE MAGDALEN LANDS OF WEST

TEIGNMOUTH.

BY MARY HALL JORDAN.

(Read at Launceston, 29th July, 1909.)

THESE Consisted of a house or group of houses for the poor, sometimes known as Lazar Houses, with a chapel attached, dedicated to St. Mary Magdalene, which stood about a mile out of Teignmouth, in the direction of Haldon.

Risdon, in his Survey of Devon, alludes to it as "a hospital which they call the Maudlin-the pious work of the inhabitants of West Teignmouth." For the first mention of this hospital known to be recorded, I am indebted to Dr. Lake, who, in his very interesting paper

on

"Ancient Teignmouth," states-on the authority of Oliver (Ecclesiastical Antiquities)—that on 27 June, 1434, Bishop Lacy granted an indulgence of forty days to sincere penitents contributing to its support ("ad sustentationem domorum pauperum de Teyngemuth infra parochiam de Teignton Episcopi situatorum.") It was evidently founded at an earlier date.

The earliest deed which I have been able to find is a conveyance of land, evidently adjoining this hospital, to Maurice Tute and Margery, his wife, by Robert Brownynge, chaplain, dated 25 March, 1526, and which I give in full :

"SCIANT presentes et futuri quod ego Robertus Brownynge Capellanus dedi concessi et hoc presenti Carta mea confirmavi Mauricio Tute et Margerie uxori sue totum illud Tenementum meum cum gardino adjacenti et suis pertinenciis infra Burgum de Westeyngmouth jacentem ibidem et existentem inter Tenementum Petri Wilfforde in parte occidentali et viam Regiam ducentem a domo leprosorum beate Marie

1 Trans. Devon. Association, Teignmouth, 1904.